The 2013 Book Push



If you follow me on IG (@salenam) I am doing a final push for the end of 2013, I have 8 books to read totally 2,238 pages. I'm 175 pages into Eat Pray Love and loving it. I read at night, at work, cooking dinner. I have about 2.5 months to go to finish these books. Each book is around 300-400 pages. Some are funny, some are intense, one is a book about personality and how it relates to career.

 

After each book I might do a short recap on how I liked the book and what I thought of the writing. 

I don't know that's pretty undecided. I think I better get reading!

 

Little over a week....

Its been a little over a week since Chris' company shut down. I've never really talked about his work before besides the fact that he had a pretty good job with flexible hours and its was fairly reliable. Over the last year we knew that the company was shutting down this part of the company. Chris worked in Polymer development for a big name drug company with a diabetes care line. I guess diabetes just isn't that profitable (?)

I think over all a break from Chris working will be good. We are incredibly blessed to have received a very generous severance package which gives him just under 6 months of paid continuation + benefits. That gives us not only the wiggle room to not stress over him not having a job, it still allows us to have fun and do the things we enjoy. Its like a long vacation. Probably around the middle of October he will start to look for a new job. After 6 years in his field it will be good to take a small break.

 With a lay off it is nice to finally be able to spend time together again. My work schedule doesn't allow for a lot of time off. Just Monday and Tuesday are my days. So its great to finally get some family time. Please think warm fuzzy thoughts for Chris doing the stay at home dad thing, even if it is short lived.

It truly is the little acts of kindness

This morning Carson was just having a rough morning. Up to early, no one was paying any attention to him because little brother is teething and having a worse day. His waffles weren't heated all the way and he had to eat them in the car because I forgot to get cash to pay the sitter. So we had to stop at the bank. I locked the car and it set the alarm. Well he opened his door and set off the alarm. Awesome. Poor kid. He's crying and its loud. I fumbled with my key to get the alarm to stop. Got back in the car and ran to do a porch pick up, he doesn't know it yet but I got him a really awesome pirate costume. He loves them. But he was just off. I asked him if he needed a "coffee" this morning because he just seemed kind of sad. He doesn't really understand whats going on, but daddy lost his job today and will be home with him until he finds another one. But they are still going to daycare because we are not transitioning them in and out like that. Its not fair to the kids. Standing in line at the starbucks, I order him a tall hot coco. With Chocolate whip cream. Yum! He seems to be perking up a bit and then BAM he drops it after only two sips. Now he'd been standing here staring at these police men drinking coffee and they had spoken to him and he was being shy. As soon as his cup hit the floor the lid shot off and it spilled every where. He burst into tears. My normal reaction would have been to tell him "You have to keep a better grip" but my instinct said he can't handle that. Instead I scooped him up and told him "bug, you have to be more careful....with the next coco, okay?" He sputtered "mama its all my fault. I spilled my coffee and I wasn't paying attention" now this is sad for someone that is 3 (and 10 months!) to verbalize its his fault. It was just an accident and he was embarrassed and upset. I put him on the chair and told him I would order him another one. When I got to the counter the barista handed me a fresh cup and said that I did not have to pay for it. That we should have a nice day and that he was a very sweet little boy. I handed him his coco and reminded him to say thank you. This tiny little voice came out of my normally very loud child. "thank you" So to the kind barista at starbucks. Thank you. I'm hoping my baby has a good day today at school because you were kind enough to replace his spilled drink.

Working mom life

Its been almost 5 months since I went back to work. I'm just starting to feel like I'm getting the hang of this working mom juggle. Its pretty much a constant struggle to be a good mom and get things done at work. I've been truly lucky that my kids haven't been sick this summer. **Knock on wood** but its pretty much go go go, as all moms know. Working and stay at home. I work Wednesday-Sunday my hours vary so sometimes I'm home in the morning, and miss bed time. Sometimes I leave in the morning and drop them at school early and am (hopefully) home for dinner.

I constantly struggle with trying to find all the time. Once Wednesday hits I'm pretty much clocked into work mode. Weekends I'm usually gone 9-8 missing family dinners and trying hard not to miss bed time.

Its trying sometimes when my kids take my days off and have really whiney crabby days. That's hard. I hate that. I enjoy spending time with them but when its constant crying and whining any parent would be over that. Today is one of those days. Mondays are our marathon day. We do the weekly Trader Joes, Target, Fred Meyer trips. Then laundry when we get home. Usually I start laundry Sunday night and have 4-5 loads to fold on Monday/Tuesday.

Tuesdays are usually spent having a play date and cleaning up the rest of the house before the work week. I truly do love being a working mom but its challenging. Its hard balancing the kids, my job, myself and my home life. As weird as it sounds, Monday night soccer is usually my weekly sanity saver. Its the one place I'm just me. Not an employee, or a mom, just myself. Speaking of that...its almost time!!

New blog....

I needed a change, I'd been "CrazyDays and CrazyNights" for far to long. I had lost the spark I need to want to post and I think part of it is that just got stale.

I'm going to really start working on posting more often and linking up with some of the awesome ladies that do IG Fridays, Weight loss check ins and other fun posts.

The one thing I hate about taking a long blog break is that the first couple posts always seem so awkward, like a big social "whats going on" dump.

Like hey, we got a beagle puppy!  Carson loved soccer! I enjoy working! Chris is still employed! Oliver loves dirt! I play co-ed grown up soccer!


Look now you are caught up. I've done a few cool things with the house that I would like to blog about, mostly because they are pretty awesome and fun, and partially because I actually followed through on something in a timely fashion (so I want my props!)

Let me know what you think of the new blog and the layout. It needs some tweaking but I think its actually pretty alright for not really a lot of effort tonight because I am exhausted and Carson just woke up soaked and had a bloody nose. So ya know...bed time.

Updates

Works been busy and I've had to take a blogcation but I think that I am back. Blogging from my iPhone today, we've been working hard on the yard and house. I'm working today and then for my two days off I have big plans to get the garage in order (again) them tackle our walk in closet, then the boys. That's right we switched them together for sleeping and turned Carson's big room into a cool play room. If you follow me on Instagram you've seen what's been happening (@salenam)

This has been a crazy busy summer, and we've really done nothing, no fishing, no camping, no hiking and that's been bumming me out. Work stresses me out sometimes with my lack of down time. I do love that when I'm home, I'm truly home though. Mondays are spent gathering the troops and restocking the supplies. Then Monday nights I spend playing adult league soccer. Tuesdays are clean the house day and we have a play date with our amazing friends and then Carson goes to soccer.

Jenn over at "The Elsewhere" blog got me thinking about getting a once or twice a month house keeper to do all the deep cleaning stuff I fail at and Chris probably doesn't realize needs done. I have a consult on Tuesday to see how much it would cost for every other week cleaning . If we can tweak it and keep the cost fairly low I think it would really help my stress and anxiety over the house work. Just knowing my bathrooms are clean would be fantastic.

Follow my Instagram @salenam  for a more day to day look at our lives

Lost Pictures not memories

Last night I took Carson to see the Croods and it reminded me of that first mothers day I enjoyed with him. A lot has changed in the last 4 years. From pregnancy to infant to not being able to get pregnant to having a toddler and a baby to now, a child and a toddler.

I think back along those first mothers day's and I remember a little bit. I had pretty severe post partum depression during Carson's first year. Last night as we waited for our movie we ran into the Apple store and I asked about getting my pictures off my MacBook because it died a few months ago and I backed all my pictures up, but now I can't seem to find the external hard drive. Well you can't take a computer and get things off the hard drive if it can't be powered up. Sad.

But then this morning I went to log into my blog account and I was signed in under an old email. An email I used when I was "blogging" after Carson was born. Luckily for me it had been more of a photo dump blog. I reverted all the old written posts back to drafts because they were just terribly sad ranting little diatribes I can't even stand to think that that was me, 3 years ago.

But I was able to salvage about 100 pictures off the blog. Totally making my morning. I've been struggling because I'm upset I lost pictures of our wedding, Carson's first year, my pregnancy, our house (even though I hate that POS life destroyer) His birthday parties and my pregnancy with Oliver.

Luckily a LOT of pictures are on facebook and now that I  have a new computer I have been slowly going through at night and downloading picture after picture into folders trying to make sure everything gets saved properly and some day (soon hopefully!!) I will find that stupid external hard drive (probably as soon as I gather everything off of facebook) and will get those pictures back.

Memories are not lost, I have about 5 HUGE (first time mom moment) photo books. If I get desperate I can scan them and down load them that way.

What a difference years make. The love for my babies is always the same though.

Long Time, No "see"

My goodness its been forever. I've been lurking on the awesome blogs I normally read trying to keep up. But its hard doing it on the phone.

Not a ton has been going on here. I'm 6 weeks into my new job in sales, specifically car sales and while I'm horrible at knowing stuff about actual cars, I actually didn't flop all that bad in my first month. Selling 5 cars and the goal for the month was 8. So not to shabby.

I really have come to realize that for the most part, its a really boring job. We don't get a ton of clients coming in the door and for the most part, its a hard sell.

For the most part I enjoy my job. I miss my boys especially when its slow and I'd rather be home with them then "wasting" my day. This crazy gorgeous PNW weather is not helping my fever to be home and be outside with my babies.


Speaking of my babies! Carson starts soccer in a couple weeks!!! I can't wait for tiny cleats and shin guards. This is just a soccer class once a week for 6 weeks to get them ready for summer soccer! Now that is what I am excited about!!

Oliver started walking a couple weeks after his first birthday I'm really proud of him. He runs now and is always into things (I forgot I didn't like the into things stage!) I can actually hear him "talking" in his crib.


Until later....I'm so glad to be back to blogging. I've really missed this.

Working moms are super heros

Until I went back to work, I had certain ideas of what life would look like with me working. As I start week 3 of going back to work I am tired, my schedule is weird sometimes. I worked 12-8 today. Tomorrow and Friday are 9-5 and then the weekend is weird. One super long day and a shorter day.

I don't have a ton of time to do much of anything when I am working. I need to get better at blogging during my days off.

During my work week I am getting the kids up, getting them to the sitter and getting to work on time. I'm making lunches and keeping the house up. Chris has stepped up beyond words to make it so much easier for me to not be totally stressed out.

Keeping up with the cloth diapers has actually been easier than I thought. It's been great that the sitter is willing to use cloth and we've been keeping up on the diapers actually better than we had before. I have no choice but to keep up.

Same with the house work, I just don't have time to sit and let it pile up. When I get home I go go go until I crash in bed. I'm so lucky that Chris is really doing his part to pitch in.

First week back

I worked my first week. I sold my first car. I had my ups and downs. I missed my babies. Of course. At the same time, I missed them. Which was great, I really loved getting to pick them up at the sitters.

Picking up my boys is great, I love seeing their little faces and holding them after a day away.

As horrible as it sounds I really like missing them. It's nice. It makes being up at night a little easier when I haven't been with fussy pants all day.

Getting a routine down will be key, I need to work on this. I have to look professional when I get to work. Some how my boys have managed to poop as soon as I'm getting them in the car. That means I have to run them into the house, change them and back to the car. Usually this makes me stressed and feel like I'm running late.

We just have some kinks to work on. But over all after my first week, I'm excited to go back after my "weekend" my work week looks like Wednesday-Sunday.

Also I'm tired and my feet hurt, so I'm going to go hit the sack. Night y'all

First day back...

Today was my first day back at work. I took the boys early to their new in home day care "just in case" they did awesome. I did...fine. I was sad as I drove away. I was leaving my most prized possessions in the care of some one I met with for an hour the week before.

I stopped off at Starbucks because its always do hard to do with the kids. It was a nice way to snap myself out of being sad.

Once at work I did the training videos and learned all about sexual harassment and discrimination.

I'm very excited for what this new adventure is going to bring. It's going to be a really good opportunity for myself and my family.

Silence usually means changes

That's how it goes over here on my blog. If I'm radio silent it means a big change is coming.

The big change is not another baby, thank god we are getting the factory shut down. The boys are amazing and perfect and really we don't want to rock the boat. Oliver still isn't sleeping great and Carson isn't potty trained.

The big change is I got a job. A good job in fact. The choice was not made lightly, Chris' job has been on the chopping block for a while. It's scary to look at our Rent and bills and know that with out his income we'd be screwed. We realistically could not afford to live on unemployment and it would be a lot of stress if/when his site closes. It's looking up now, but you just don't know and it was a wake up call that we honestly need a second income.

I found the boys a daycare. They'll be there 3 days a week and Chris will be home on the weekends and I'll be home Monday/Tuesday. I'm nervous to leave them, it will be a big adjustment. But I'm excited this will bring a lot of good things for my family. Like searching for a new home in 3-4 years. We'll actually be able to save a decent down payment. We'll be able to go on real vacations, and put money away for a rainy day. I'm most excited about house hunting. Getting an idea of what we will be able to buy. I have not allowed myself to even look at real estate for the last couple years because we just were not ready, and while it will take a few years to save a solid down payment. It will be great to be moving forward!

So yeah, there it is. Also my computer is broken so I tapped this out on my trusty iPhone. Excuse any and all typos and sad grammar.

In other news...

My MacBook officialy died. Hence, radio silence. I'm learning to use my kindle fire.

Oliver turned one last week which was crazy!! He's a big kid, 30 inches tall and almost 24 lbs. I have a ton of pictures to share when I get my computer up and running or get a new one.

Carson's health problems are coming to a head and we'll be taking him to OHSU in the coming weeks to see a GI doctor :( I will elaborate more when I start getting results back.

I really need to catch up on house stuff and have just been lazy this week.

Running with the wee ones...

So friday morning I sat down to read some blogs. I've got to say I love being apart of a facebook blogger group. I love having the daily "reminder" to stop and read whats going on with other peoples lives that are also local. But friday morning I came across this blog in the reader, she titled it Controversy Hobby Jogger as I read it I really had no idea that there were people out there that considered themselves "Elite" runners that weren't doing it professionally (are there actually professional runners outside of like the Olympics/nationals?)

As I read it I realized, I don't really consider myself any sort of runner. I enjoy running. I love running with the boys in the jogger, I like running on a treadmill alone. I love listening to music while I run.  I don't run terribly far. I did 2 miles on saturday pushing the jogger with the boys and that felt good. I don't think I'll make my 500 mile goal (I kinda failed horribly already.)

I will say that even after reading the blog post, I was slightly more aware of encountering other runners. I was pleasantly surprised though that while out running on saturday morning I didn't encounter any "elites" I encountered a lot of respect. It was mutual because even being a "hobby jogger" I'm still lapping my former self on the couch, and thats what matters.

Baby Boy...

My little Man turned ONE on wednesday! Woah. So crazy. We had such a great day. His party is Saturday so that will be fun.

He reminded me four times last night that he is, still in fact a baby. By being up 45 minutes each time he woke up.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to my Darling little boy. 

What a year this has been. 

Some favorite from this year 

Its friday

Normally today is for Flaunt Your Fluff Friday to keep the cloth diapering posts to one day. But anyway, I don't have much to say on that. 

Its unbelievably gorgeous out today for the PACNW. Like WOAH. Its hot out sun is shining, we had a play date with some new(ish) friends and then ran Chris some lunch since he left pizza for me. We had a nice Vday of pizza and college basketball. 

But yeah today called for daytime margarita and playing out in the back yard. Seriously moving was the best thing ever. 

Happy Love Day

Valentines Day...

We can't be the only people that don't celebrate, like at all, right?  Chris isn't into V-day and over the years its been easier to just blow the holiday off so I'm not left feeling disappointed when I've gotten him a card or made him something and I've gotten nothing. But thats kind of how it always goes.

I probably will have the boys get me some chocolates though.

So tell me, do you make a big deal of the holiday or just let it roll off your back? Is your significant other into the holiday? Is it hard if both parties involved have a different level of expectations on this day?

done

I give up. 

Today was seriously the worst day in the history of shitty days. I'm good. Think they make diapers for college kids? Yeah I don't think so. Obviously all kids end up trained, and today/tomorrow/this week is just not my kids time. 

Here we go again...

Not pregnant!

Potty training.

I think this marks 18 months since the first time we attempted potty training Carson. Each regression is harder than the last and each time we throw in the towel getting him back to it is worse. I'm not entirely sure why I'm trying again, he's even more resistant than last time. He cares all of 0% if he's wet or dirty. He'd sit in a poop diaper all day if I didn't insist on changing him.

I'm not entirely sure he won't be 4 years old and still in diapers. It makes me feel like a failure. I know I would have judged myself HARD before having kids. This is karma's payback for Chris and I judging his cousins 4 year old for not being potty trained.


I'm going to keep a PTing journal for 3 weeks ("they" say it takes 3 weeks to fully train. I call total bullshit)

Hopefully I don't go bald.

Flaunt Your Fluff Friday:Wk2

This week is Oliver wearing a Hungry Caterpillar Diaper during his Cake Smash Photo Session with

 Brittany Stewart Photography

I'm seriously so in love with this picture! I can't wait to get my CD and put my favorite blown up on the stair way.

Also, 2.20.13 is coming up way to fast. How is it possible he will be one in no time???  

Things I love Thursday...

Beautiful Flowers from my Carson. He said they were pretty, and I was pretty so I should have them

Some broke in the process of cutting them and so I got some flowers for our bedroom window!

Dinner tonight is going to be FABULOUS!

Knitting project. Trying my hand at a wool soaker for Oliver

This kid has Swagger for sure. These are his "StarRock" glasses

The Back yard is dug up, pulled tons of clay out, laid manure, cedar mulch and grass seeds.!! Whoop! 

Good People...

All I want for my boys in life is to be good people. 

While I don't have any "proof" that what I'm doing with them now will make them good people, I sure do hope that someday I will look back on when they were young and think "Wow we did a good job raising them"  Some might call it antiquated, or old fashioned. 

But I hope my boys always open doors for women, and give up their seat on a bus so an elder, or lady may sit down. I hope they know to pay for dinner on a date and never sit in their car and honk the horn (God forbid I find out they do this steam will come from my ears) I hope they take out the garbage because they notice its full, and make their beds because it saves their Mama an extra few minutes for my coffee. I hope they know they can always come home to a home cooked meal and fresh laundry. 

I hope that when they are offered a drink at a party they say "No thank you, I'm driving" or have the good sense to call me, no matter the time. 

I'm raising boys, that will turn into men. I'm raising boys that will be deserving of good women. I'm raising boys that no matter what they do in life I will be proud of them. Cause I know, in my heart they will be good people.

-Disclaimer- 

Obviously I don't know if what I am doing is working. Carson is 3 and while he hasn't hit true defiance yet, I feel like he's turning into a really "good" kid. He's helpful and sweet and while I'm waiting for the terrible to get here (and some days it is) I really think over all on the path he is on, we won't have major issues in the future. Obviously anything can contribute to rebellion at a later age. But these are just my wishes for them in life. 

Bed sharing with a three year old...

Not totally sure how we got in this mess. Not saying that bedsharing is bad or what ever. We actually CHOSE to bed share when Carson was a baby (and took up a lot less room) mostly because our house was not set up properly with bedrooms so it wasn't a reality for Carson to sleep in his room.  Anyway thats besides the point. He had been successfully moved into his own bed and his own room for like a YEAR! Okay a fucking year. So, 1/3 of his life.

I've been pretty gentle with him because the move was hard on him. Then he went through a monsters phase, and now "ghosts" so I've been torn on kicking him out at night. Cause it sure as shit beats what used to happen, he'd just wake up crying and screaming and I'd have to go in and sooth him (not knocking soothing I really don't mind...that much)  I personally don't mind, because he doesn't over snuggle me. Its Chris who he pretty much muscles out of the bed, and recently Chris has been leaving in the middle of the night and sleeping on the couch. Which just isn't fare.

So tonight I decided to pull out the extra crib mattress and throw an extra sheet, pillow and blanket. I told him if he comes into our room in the night he HAS to go to his little bed. Or he'll be back in his room. I'm guessing at some point I'll wake up and he'll be in our bed, sleeping on Chris' face.


Does anyone have any advice for kicking the dude out of our bed and our room? I honestly don't mind right now, but I can totally see him being like 8 and still sleeping on a crib mattress in our bedroom.

Super Bowl Sunday

I love sports, I love to watch them, I love to play them, I love to talk about them. So Super Bowl Sunday is like MY favorite day of the 1/2 of the year!

I spent all morning yesterday prepping lunch, watching the pregame shows and over all just enjoying the day. I cranked up the country in my kitchen and made Sweet Tea, Pulled Pork, Soyaki Drumsticks, Bread Cubes with Cheddar/Horseradish dip, Carrots and Broccoli with Bacon/Cheddar/Ranch dip, and of course chips and salsa.  As always beer and coke are served.

Oh and if you have a costco, run don't walk, and get those pretzel slider buns. They are like the best thing to happen in my kitchen. EVER.

We had such a great day. A good friend of ours came and hung out, we played football at the park in front of our house during half time. I had gotten Carson some disk guns so those were a hit during the low parts of the game (hello first 3 quarters where the Ravens stomped the 49ers.)

The commercials were so hit or miss this year. The game finally got good after that power outage.  6wks till Selection Sunday! Whoop March Madness!

Stepping Out Saturday: Lee Jeans review

So back in November I attended the PacNW Blogger Meet up at the fabulous West Elm. You can read about it here. I had such a great time and I even WON a pair of Lee Jeans as part of an IG giveaway. I'm all OH SNAP I never win anything. Ever.

So I waited for them to email me and give me directions on picking my jeans and then they would ship. Well I picked but in the mess surrounding the holidays I never received my jeans. I emailed the Lee Jeans representative Katy and let her know what was up and that I hadn't gotten them yet.

She felt terrible and was so sweet she got another pair out to me in the mail ASAP. Once I received them and washed them up I was so excited. They fit really cute and enhance my booty (don't we all need a little lift post kids?)

I got these in a size 10, probably could have gone up to a 12 to avoid muffin top but I am working really hard on pounding out the miles and losing the weight, so I'd rather have something to look forward to fitting in the next few months over something to throw in the "to big" pile.  I was so happy with the customer service as far as getting me the pants after the snafu of them not getting shipped. They came really fast. I'm just very happy with them and will be ordering more in the future.

I am NOT a fashion blogger. So "posing" included me walking away from my husband while he took my picture on my iPhone.

Flaunt Your Fluff Friday!

Okay excuse any and all typos and spelling errors today. I'm clicking this out on my iPhone cause I just did 4 loads of clothing laundry and have a basket of diapers waiting to be stuffed. So I don't really want to wander down stairs to where I have to use my laptop (because it's crazy and won't pick up wifi more than 7 feet from the box) Lesigh.

Any way, this is the first week of Flaunt Your Fluff Friday! I'm excited because its been 2ish weeks cloth diapering and I really do still enjoy it quite a bit. I don't see this stopping anytime soon. My goal is of course do it till Oliver potty trains.

I'm gonna pick a day and write about one brand of diaper since we are using a ton of different diapers and I wish I'd had more info when deciding. I'm glad we have a decent sized stash of lots of different brands though! some mid range and some less expensive, some made by amazing women putting love in every diaper, to some probably being made by the thousands.

I am currently trying to get a good over night solutions to mister heavy wetter (Carson) currently a fitted work horse and hemp doubler with a flip cover are working. But I either need to order more or find another decent option. That's he only problem we've run into, Carson wets so hard at night, but that was an issue with huggies/pampers too.

The chevron? Oh I die! It's a Smush Tush from my friend Katherine! Check her etsy out @Smushtush :)

I love the look of drying diapers on the side ways baby gate. Lol. This summer were putting up a clothes line for sure!!

Baby booty sleeping! Alva baby diaper. Love how cheap they are. They make up a good portion of our stash since I was trying to do cloth diapering on the cheap :-)

Seahawks diaper! Not much to say. I love WAHM etsy diapers. Wish I had a bigger diaper budget for some of those!!

Thankful Thursday....

I'm working on doing more "Weekly Posts" let me know if these are a good idea, or if you'd rather see random content.


Anyway...This week I am Thankful for....

Filing my taxes so early, it means that I am going to get a new desktop computer sooner than planned and because my laptop is basically dead (Yeah its "usable" but its only a matter of time before it just won't work) I'm going to get a KindleFire HD 8.9.

I'm thankful that this weekend is the Super Bowl. Go Ravens :)

I'm thankful for getting to spend some quality time with my family last weekend.

I'm thankful for all my boys this week. Its been so grey outside I've been kind of blah but they've been good to me

I'm thankful for the good friends I do have. Yesterday's post was kind of depressing, about friendships ending and it really does remind me to focus on keeping the friendships I have alive. I love the friends in my life, whether they've been in my life a long time, or are just coming into my life.

I'm thankful for my readers. I have over 20k+ in page views and that makes me so happy and oddly giddy!

What are you thankful for? If you want to link up your thankful thursday posts, just post a link in the comments and I will come and read what you are thankful for! :)

A Reason, A Season, A Lifetime

Ever hear that saying? "Friendships are here for a reason, a season, or a lifetime" Now I believe friendships can be all 3. Coming and going, liquid. Some are definitely only for a reason or a season. But Lifers, they are all 3. Besides my husband and family I only have 2 people that have been constant in my life for a long time (5 years!)

M was my Made of Honor. We met in college, bonded over a dead baby pig. I'm actually shocked that M and I are friends, she pretty much rocked that class, and I pretty much rocked in the corner gagging. We've had our friendship ups and downs but over all I know that we will be friends for the long haul. We're very different, but I think thats what has kept us close. Even though she lives a million miles away doing TFA (Teach For America) We still talk on the regular.

A is another "lifer" of mine. We actually met on a "Set up" date though a mutual friend. He's one of the most amazing men I know and has always been a constant and great person to bounce ideas off of. Again even though he lives far away, we still talk on facebook and joke. Its funny, A didn't even know it was a set up until way after the fact and we were already best friends.

Then the friendships that last a season, they usually aren't worth mentioning. They come into your life, but then stay awhile and leave. These include random people you hang out with in college when your bored.

But the friendships that come in for a Reason, those are worth mentioning. These are the friends that come into your life either for a lifetime or a season, but they touch you (not in a dirty way.) They bring something to your life that was missing. These hurt the most when they only last a season. A "season" just ended with a friend that was most definitely for a reason.

Sorry if this post is depressing. I'm just mourning the loss of a friendship that grew apart.

Happy 300th Post to Myself....

Ah man had I realized that my 300th post was coming up I would have saved my vagina story for that and put something fluffy in for 299.  Oh well. My 500th post will just have to be crazy epic.  I hope something crazy will happen to top Vaginagate.

Anyway my 300th post is going to be about cloth diapers. Ugh I'm lame today. I filed taxes and shit so thats cool. But man I just am not "in it" today. I'm still in jammies and no bra. I dyed my hair last night and am excited to go shower during nap time and blow it out so I can actually see the color of it. Finally getting to a nice length which I love.

Anyway, back on topic. We have now been cloth diapering for over 2 weeks. Obviously I'm an expert by now (HAHA) Its amazing though how much better Olivers booty looks and its just so gosh darn cute. If you want to see fluffy butt pictures check me out on IG@SalenaM

I have a few still out in the mail that I am looking forward to getting so I can take inventory and take pictures.

What a lame 300th post.

Hey Stranger, Wanna talk about my vagina?

So this gem of a story starts last night. I was changing the boys into their night night diapers and Carson starts going on about how he has a fishy (penis) and daddy has a fishy and Oliver has a fishy. This "stage" is just fantastic.  Any way he gets to me, and goes "Mommy does not have a fish. She has a coooo" Chris and I looked at eachother and I made the mistake.....of saying "I thought he was about to say Couch" and BAM. "Mama has a COUCH A CHOUCH A CHOUUUUUUUCH."

FML.

Fast forward to this morning, I'm getting in the shower (with the door closed) and in burst my intrusive sweet child. With pointing finger "Mama thats your couch!"

First of all, I don't think I have ever called it that. So I sat him down and told him that its not called a couch its called a vagina, like he has a penis but he can nickname it a fish, its still a penis.

Fast Forward some more. Inside Trader Joes we're walking and this happened.

Carson "Hey you, Guy in the black! (As he points to some random stranger) MY MOMMY HAS A VAGINA!!!"

Me? Well lets just say I wish the world would have opened up and swallowed me.

The man? Well luckily he was very flip and goes "Well she is a mommy, so I bet she does."    //dead//

So random stranger that knows about my vagina status.....Thanks for not being a dick about it.

Please some one make me feel better and share a story of your own child/dog/husband/friend/parent embarrassing you

Former Lactavist

This is probably going to be weird, and jumbled. Sorry I'm a little tipsy. But this has been weighing on me.

With Carson I fought so hard to breast feed him. We struggled from the beginning and it was HARD. I was also "That" first time mom that obviously knows everything. I also thought MY was way the ONLY way. Honestly? I was an insufferable twat.  That being said I would fucking nurse my baby WHERE EVER I GODDAMNED PLEASED. I'm not kidding I was "that" lady with my tit out feeding my kid where ever. Because obviously that was my right. (I do not disagree that women shouldn't nurse where ever they please) I still totally support breast feeding and the rights to breast feed where ever your child needs. Same with pumping. The right to feed your kid is not in question.

Then I had Oliver, awesome little nurser and super easy to feed. Until he started biting. By 11 months we are weaning. I bought formula. Taught him to take a bottle and, I have to say its wonderful. I love having my boobs be mine again. I enjoyed this when I weaned Carson fully (at 17 months) I love nursing, I honestly think that most should try it. But my "self worth" in motherhood is not wrapped up in my ability to breastfeed. I've gotten a ton of  "Why don't you just stick it out and make it the year" Honestly? I just don't want to any more. He's our last kid most likely and I enjoy being "Me" not just "mommy"

Well people formula is not the devils. Its healthy and nutritious, giving my child a bottle for the last month of his "infancy" won't make him less awesome it just means I don't have titties that bleed (cause he's a BITER)


So there, a former lactavist stating that formula is actually GOOD for my family right now/.

As Promised

A post of things in my home that make me smile. I'm obviously forgetting some things. Like my galvanized wash bin that holds blankets rolled up at the end of my couch, and the down stairs bathroom that makes it so much less awkward for guests.

Because at the apartment you either used the boys "kid" bathroom which hardly ever had toilet paper because, well toddlers. Or you got to go through our bedroom and use ours. Which almost always had a sink cluttered in stuff. Now its just a nice down stairs bathroom that is always clean, and always has toilet paper.

I love our "bar" and its a nice place to store my vintage film nikkormat from my dad.
Wine rack with glasses underneath is my favorite Christmas present.
This wall with the leather chairs, will be an amazing seafoam accent wall soon.
Chris' Birthday present. Matted and Framed "painting" of Portland city Skyline. Probably the thing we miss the most living in suburbia. 

I love walking up my stairs and seeing my photo wall. Complete with giant vintage clock.

Teal "painted" chair. It was so ugly when I found it at a thrift store for 5$
Door Headboard. Doorboard.  + Hand made Mr.Mrs. Pillows.
Teal Owl that holds the door open and the baby gate

Carson's Space. His guitar, his bed and his tent. 

The pictures with me in it? Yeah Carson took those with my nikon. Like my DSLR Nikon. Its not a light camera. I love Oliver's room. Its small(ish) but it fits him perfectly.
Also a fluffy picture because well, I love it!

But the things I love the most. Are right here in this picture. 

A little sleep and a promise....

I'm so excited awake today! I got a 4 hour stretch of sleep for the first time in months. I think the closest to sleeping through the night has been waking every 3 hours. So 4 was like magic! I woke up and didn't feel like chugging coffee straight from the pot. Oh no one else does that? Just me? Okaaaay.

I'm gonna make ya'll a little promise since we're coming up on living in the town house 3 months and I've done no pictures or posts mostly cause I'm lazy. Mostly cause I actually haven't gotten all the things I wanted to done yet. So the rest of this week I'm going to take pictures of all the things that make me happy in my home. We've gotten some projects done that really do make me smile when I look at them, like our stair way. I'm working on getting a really nice picture wall going because the white walls were driving me batty but no one wants to paint it (its 2 story vaulted)

I'm going to Ikea on Friday with our old neighbor and her friend and all the munchkins so that will be a really fun time. I need to get some things for Oliver's Forest room. :)


So grateful to finally feel human again!! Today when Oliver wakes up we're going to go on a power walk and try to get back in the groove of things.

Tuesday, Why you not Wednesday?

Night three of miserable sleep is not helping me fight this horrible cold sick bug that I've got going. I woke up saturday with a terrible headache that lasted all day. I honestly thought I was hung over from the two margaritas I downed at the bar for the hub's birthday party.  Well I was still "hung over" with stuffy nose on sunday...Then again on monday. The headache could very well be from lack of sleep. But the head cold part is all sickness that is not getting fought off because I'm getting less than 4 hours of sleep a night.

I have totally abandoned my NYE goal of running 500 miles in 2013. Not truly abandoned it but every day I can't run because of this crud and lack of sleep is 2 miles I have to tag on to another day. Which is fine, but its been a week (thanks to awful period from hell and then being sick) so I know it will be harder to get back in my groove. I'm planning on running a 5k in July and still planning on the warrior dash in september so I have those things to work for.

Also for the first time in 5 years I want to feel truly comfortable this summer in a bikini by the pool. I have never switched to a mom suit, always rocked a bikini even over weight. But never truly 100% comfortable with my body. So this year I'd really like to feel comfy by the pool.

Oh Sleep, you elusive girl you...

A few weeks ago Oliver went through a stage of not sleeping, it was coupled with pretty horrendous separation anxiety and it was rough. I was so tired, I am really one of those people that needs 6+ hours of sleep a night or I am pretty much non functioning.

We "reset" him with ferber and he was back to sleeping in 2-3 hours blocks again (yeah only 2-3 no STTN in this house) but it was better.

Well now we're on night to of 5+ hours of crying at night. I just don't know what to do with him. I'm so tired, I slept holding him in the rocking chair most of the night so my neck is tight, my arms hurt, and I think I have an ear infection. So yeah.....

Anyone else want to chime in with a story of their crappy sleeper? I really feel like all I see on FB and Social media is people excited their babies sleep through the night and its like "Okay good for you....let me just down my 5th cup of coffee"

Also today The Inauguration. I am so proud of the Obama family, I just love them and think they are such a solid family. I'm a little emotional that President Obama is being sworn in on MLK day. Thats simply, amazing.

Painted Toes, and Mama Woes....

I've always painted Carson's toes if he asked. Its never been something I've questioned. I paint mine and he wants to be like me because he spends a lot (all) his time with me. But then I began to question it when I posted a picture of Facebook, not even of his painted toes but just a picture that you could plainly tell his toes were painted (Green and yellow from the Civil War) and I got some comments being all "ZOMG are those painted toes"

Its always been just normal for me to paint his tootsies when I paint mine. Usually I use it as a way to get him to let me clip his dragon toes.

So what says the blogosphere ? Little boys with painted toes (BTW his are TEAL right now.) Is it Okay? Not Okay? Age to stop? I just can't seem to get my panties in a twist over a 3 year old having painted toes.

Playgroups

I went to a play group today, you know that weird feeling when you sit around with a group of people for the first time and things just kind of click? I never feel that normally. But today as crazy toddlers and young children ran around and we sat, drank coffee and talking about Sons of Anarchy, Breaking Bad, and Walking Dead (Oh yeah and football love!) I felt for the first time that I found a tribe to belong to.

It doesn't hurt that tomorrow night is Moms Night out, we're going to a ladies night shooting range followed by line dancing. I will update on how badass of a time we have tomorrow night! Booyah!

Currently I am....

I'm totally snagging this idea from some lovely PNW bloggers I've seen it pop up and I love the idea of stopping to think about whats going on in different aspects of your life. 

Working on the blog, trying to decide what I want to do with it. Should it be more "Me" or more "lifestyle" or leave it where its at with the family blog. 

Drinking Nothing but water, I had put a bottle of wine in the fridge and I'm sad I forgot about it until after I brushed my teeth. 

Enjoying Some snuggles with my big baby. Sort of. This will be like night 4 of him being a bedtime squatter. He hasn't felt great but this is getting ridiculous.

Considering if its worth the fight to put Carson in his room tonight or if I should waive the white flag and just let him and his farty booty stay 

Noticing  How much I enjoy listening to the classical music that plays as background to his shows. Its nice. 

"Oh your baby is almost 1, Another one?"

Anyone else get this question when baby starts approaching one year? We have 2 kids already and we are getting the "Oh its time for another baby!!" questions and "pressure".

I have been trying to work out a response that not only say's "We're currently placing any more family planning on hold" with "My kids sleep like newborns so maybe someday we'll have enough energy to have sex on the regular again"

Usually I just smile and shake my head "no"

Its not that we don't want another baby, I'd love to have another squishy newborn. But the idea of being outnumbered scares the shit out of me. For what ever reason my heart breaks that Oliver won't get 1on1 time with us until Carson is in school. Another baby would rob him of the little time he would get. Carson is such a great big brother and for the most part they get along amazingly. Why fix what isn't broken?

I just need a nice way to telling people to butt out, we aren't ruling more kids out, but we are on the side of the 2 and done fence. I'm happy on this side of the fence.

"Perfection"

Lately I've been spending more time on Pinterest (I totally got out of habit for a long time) and I've really started to notice all the "Pinter-perfect" houses and yards and kids and family and everything. I sometimes get all down on myself because we aren't Pinterest perfect.
Thursday I was taking pictures of the set up I've got going with Olivers cloth diapers and I actually thought to myself "Self, these pictures aren't good enough for the blog. They are on your iPhone and there are toys on the floor the changing cover is askew and the walls are white still"

Seriously. Also yeah I talk to myself at home.  So I didn't end up actually taking any pictures. Maybe I'll paint the walls and clean up the toys and then take some pictures. No I'm kidding. No I'm not, Sherwin Williams is running 25% off right now, I probably will end up painting at some point!

I really hate how everything has become a "contest" Mommy wars are strong. Everything breeds the "You're not good enough" and I don't know about you, but my inner voice does that enough.

I didn't make many NYE resolutions this year, mostly because I never follow through and mostly because I hate the whole new year new you thing. But in a way we are doing some major life changes. Going greener, living more simply, eating healthier and running more (500 miles!)  I am also going to start being a better blogger and writer. I'd like to get over 500 posts by next year (total not 500 more! I'm at 289)

Cloth Diapering

I'm going to write a series of blog posts over the next month or so as I get the rest of our cloth diapers in the mail. I'm going to be writing about how to do it on the cheap, because lets face it. Besides saving the earth, and creating less waste, and keeping a cute booty in something not toxic or harmful.  Its about savings. I'm not going to pull out the you will save THOUSANDS.

Because, well everyone knows that if you spend the money upfront to cloth diaper, and are smart about finding good deals, and buying lesser known brands, or second hand diapers you will actually save a lot of money.

What are types are we using? 

- Mostly pocket diapers
-Covers and prefolds
-GDiapers

What Brands? 

- GDiapers (Purchased used from a friend)
-Kawaii 
-Alva Baby 
-BumGenius
-Smush Tush
-Sunbaby

How Many do you really need?

Right now I am unsure how many we actually will need. Right now, we are only using Gdiapers I got these from a friend for really cheap, I was so grateful because we were down to 7 disposables and I really didn't want to buy more just because I was waiting for diapers in the mail! We have 10 G covers and 14 cloth liners, right now. Thats enough to get us till our packages come in, but thats laundry every day.

We also have a handful of pockets right now, 2 Kawaii and 1 BumGenius and 1 Smush Tush. I am liking these at night because they are seriously crazy stuff-able for night time use.


Affordability? 

I'm trying to keep the start up costs as low as possible so we actually DO end up saving money. Currently (On my spreadsheet) I've spent 211$. At 60$ a month for disposable diapers I will break even in 3.5 months. Once I break even I think I will splurge on some etsy print diapers that are super cute. Especially for summer when he can just run around in his fluffy booty!  We aren't planning anymore children right now so I want to keep costs lower in case we don't use them again.

Will This become and Eco Family Blog?

Probably for a while, I am going to try to feature a different cloth diaper week by week, do pros and cons of each and of course loads of pictures. I will also post about different things we do to make cloth diapering easier on us. I have some projects already in the works. Like a drop down drying rack over my dryer that I can put up when not in use (I have cabinets that I still need to open!)  Putting a line outside for this summer for sunning and drying.


All in all we are super excited to get really into this. Its crazy how silly things like what to put on your kids booty gets you all excited!

So I'll probably be obsessive for a moment

After making the decision to switch to cloth diapers, I've gotten so excited and borderline obsessive on what I want,  how many I want, and all the colors and prints!

We've decided to stick with one style for now. Pockets. I can stuff them at night after washing them and just put them on like disposables.

My first few orders will be rolling in soon! I've decided to go with a mix of Alva Baby and Kawaii for now, they are a pretty reasonably priced. Have good reviews, and I can order both from the same website.


These are the ones coming in the mail in the next week or so

Alva baby Bird House

Oh Baby Ka 

Light blue in the background (Kawaii)

Kawaii