2 weeks

I can't believe it's been 2 weeks since our little Ollie came into our family. It's been a transition for sure. But something that surprised me, I never knew I could love Carson more than I did before Oliver was born. So on top of these new feelings of bursting with love for Oliver, im also bursting with new love for Carson. Some times the amount of love I am feeling is overwhelming and I find myself tearing up.

I also am really glad that so far (knock on wood) I have not began experiencing any signs of post partum depression or anxiety. I was already suffering from anxiety after Carson was born within about a week it was full blown. This time around we are on te watch for any signs to start treatment or therapy. Things I never looked into when I suffered with Carson.

Post partum healing has been interesting, I'm bleeding a lot more this time around but I'm hoping that's a good sign that the other side of my uterus will stay intact and won't develop all the scar tissue that was caused with my first delivery.

Oliver is growing at an amazing rate he's already up to 9lbs 1 oz at his 2 week well check. 21 1/2 inches long! I'm so happy he's such a hungry little guy it's a lot less stressful to have a kid that wants to eat than one that never wanted to nurse.

Carson is doing splendid as a big brother. Im so proud of him and how well he's adjusted.

Chris and I and our relationship has only gotten stronger these last few weeks. He's just been amazing letting me rest, helping me heal. Taking such great care of Carson when he's home and giving me the breaks I need.

Its amazing how different and yet so alike kids can be. Holding on to tiny little Oliver is just amazing and then watching my big boy jump from the coffee table to the couch and laugh hysterically at himself. Amazing.

Something cute I noticed about Oliver, he always has his left hand by his face. Something I did not realize until recently, that is the same hand that he was born with up by his head causing all the "problems" not really problems, but the reason I needed a tiny episiotomy because it was let his shoulder break or cut me. I'm so glad my OB disregarded my "birth plan" of preferring to tear naturally as apposed to being cut. Had we let me "tear" I wouldn't have, his shoulder would have broken. Just a life lesson in being fluid with life in all aspects.

I'm trying not to stress to much, but it seems like things might not be doing so hot for Chris at work right now. Nothing with him, but the company might either be trying to find a partner, or sell it. We aren't sure what that means for us. But at least he's been there almost 5 years. Sure makes me glad we aren't under a mortgage anymore and if things came down to it, we could move so easily (but I'll fucking cry if we have to move less than a year after painting. I fucking love my colors I painted the house!)

But like I said, everything in life just needs to stay in motion. Just gotta go with the flow.